Dealing With Our Senior Population – Part 2: With Respect or As Children?
Contributed by Doug Ferguson
Last month I pointed out the very obvious cultural difference in how the Japanese treat their elders compared to much of the Western world, especially here in the United States.
In America, especially since the end of WWII, we have come to glorify a “youth” culture in both media and actual practice, and more recently, label any traditions or wisdom from seniors as “old school” Ideas. Our younger generation views these as “not cool” and should therefore be discarded. Many just see seniors as “Grandparent Babysitters”.
As more and more of the younger generation have moved into adulthood and are now running our country’s institutions, we are seeing this in how our older generation is treated, especially in the ever-growing health field. Recently I have had a series of medical problems that have put me in a position to see how seniors with either temporary or permanent physical handicaps are treated in the environment just described.
Last year an emergency back operation left me first in a wheelchair, then a walker and now with canes. For my physical rehabilitation I was admitted to a senior care facility for a month or so. Of the population of the facility at the time, only about 20% of us were there for physical rehab. The rest were permanent long term care patients. During this period the excellent re-hab staff got me started on walkers and canes to transition back to living at home. I was happy with what they did for me.
During my stay, taking myself in a wheelchair to their cafeteria area for meals each day, I had to chance to meet other patients. Some were there for rehab like myself, and others there for long term care. While the staff was basically helpful to all, you definitely got the feel that the patients with the most obvious handicaps like mobility or speech problems were being treated like children. One lunchmate in his 60’s, who had a lifetime of experience throughout Alaska as a Forestry agent, was learning to speak and achieve some level of mobility again after a serious stroke. He managed to tell me sarcastically that the lady who was responsible for wheeling him back and forth to the cafeteria was acting like “his mother”!
Another 90-year-old lunchmate was a broad-shouldered man who now didn’t have the use of his legs and was also being brought to meals in a wheelchair. As I started to get him into conversation, he seemed very depressed. It turned out he was a former firefighter in New York City where he spent an exciting career fighting big time fires! Now he was “immobile”, in his terms and “can’t do anything anymore”. Here was someone who had given up on life. I wasn’t sure what his family situation was, but he sure needed some social contact and respect!
Back up on the floor, it became very obvious that the nationwide shortage of nurses extended to Alaska! Since only registered nurses could pass medicines, this was almost a full-time task for each RN available. This situation was exacerbated by another problem: the increasing quantify of drugs fed to seniors, many to deal with their depressed mental states caused by pain, isolation or both. Most other routine tasks were by necessity handed off to mostly younger trainees who were much more into treating seniors as children or at least dismissing them as “old school” or else not into forming any serious interactions with them.
While some group social activities like Bingo were organized for those who would or could leave their rooms, there was virtually no time for social interaction for these “room-bound” patients except for visiting hours if they were fortunate enough to have friends and family that came.
Regarding interaction with seniors in the public domain, most people are kind and try to be helpful, holding open doors, letting mobility limited seniors like myself pass first, get in lines and other forms of courtesy. I have learned to thank them for their kindness. However, in most of these cases where conversation is limited, one still can detect an attitude of their dealing with someone else’s child!
What is the solution to all of this? Obviously, there is no “silver bullet” given we don’t have a cultural history like Japan. However, if we could somehow get our youth and care taking adults to realize every senior, they meet has had a lifetime of experiences and stories. No matter what their disabilities are, it would make their day if you could find the time and the way to ask them to share some of their memorable ones with you!
Besides, you just might learn something!